The Brotherhood Express
by Red Witch
Summary: The boys get a toy train.


**I don't own X-Men Evolution characters or Lionel trains or anything. This was inspired by a gift my Dad got this Christmas. **

**The Brotherhood Express**

It was a few days after Christmas, just before New Year's. Lance as a bit crankier than usual. Then again, Pietro had covered his jeep with toilet paper because Lance had refused to let him drive again. Even though Pietro felt he was entirely justified and there was nothing Lance could do about it, he thought it might be a good idea to take a walk and get out of the house for a while. At least until he was sure that there really wasn't a flame-thrower in the house. 

Todd was bored and decided to join him, so Pietro had to walk at a 'normal' pace. For once, Pietro didn't mind. He wasn't in the mood for being alone that particular day and felt like having someone to talk to as he walked downtown. Well that and he would have a willing accomplice just in case he decided to do some 'window shopping' Pietro style. 

For now he was content to merely look inside the windows and stare at the gaudy holiday decorations still inside. He and Todd talked about how they both missed New York City and what a dump Bayville was. Lately, that had become their favorite topic. 

"Be Bored in Bayville, the Boringest Place on Earth!" Todd quipped. At the moment they were playing a game Pietro liked to call: "Truth in Advertisement." Basically it was a creative way to insult the town, places in town and certain residents that began with X and ended in Men. 

"Bayville" Pietro thought. "Come and be buried in the world's largest cemetery."

"More like a landfill," Todd snickered. 

"Okay how about this: Bayville. We've finally got rid of the mosquitoes!" 

"Bayville: We finally caught the underwear thief!"

"Need a break from it all? Come to Bayville. Ten minutes here and you'll wish you had stress!" Pietro smirked. 

"Hey here's one," Todd pointed to a half blown snowman decoration. "Come to Bayville and see the worst Christmas decorations ever!" 

"Man I can hardly wait until we leave this stinking town for good!" Pietro huffed. 

"Yeah," Todd looked around. "Even the stupid window displays are dorky."

"What do you expect? This is Bayville: Home of the Dorks!" 

Todd's eyes widened at one window's display. "Hey hold up!" Todd pressed his face against the window. Pietro saw that a train display had captured his attention. Todd's eyes followed the train as it went around and around on the tracks. "Oh man that is so cool!" Todd yelped. 

"Nice train set," Pietro nodded.

"Not just any train set," Todd's voice had a hint of awe in it. "It's a Lionel Santa Fe Steam Freighter Set! That's like the cream of the crop!"

"You know about trains?"

"A little," Todd shrugged. "I've always wanted one. I remember when I was little and every year I'd ask Santa for one, but…" His voice trailed off as he looked longingly back to the display. 

An idea formed in Pietro's brain. He smiled and put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Well little buddy you are in luck," Pietro grinned. "Santa Pietro's come to town!" 

A few hours later, Lance came out of his room and yelped back in surprise when a train nearly ran over his foot. Of course it was only a toy train but still…

"What the heck is going on here?" Lance shouted as he saw train tracks all over the hall. Lance followed the tracks to Pietro's room. He saw Todd, Pietro and Fred wearing conductor outfits complete with hats. "Oh no…"

"All aboard!" Pietro called out.

"Here we go!" Todd whooped.

"Choo Choo!" Fred made train noises. 

"I'm not even gonna ask where you got this," Lance decided it was best to simply go with the flow. 

"Hey Lance!" Fred smiled. "Wanna play train?" 

"Why not?" Lance shrugged and sat down next to them. "Cool, look at all the accessories you got!"

"Yeah there's a little farm," Todd pointed out.

"Moo!" Fred held up a cow and played with it.

"And there's a Ferris wheel and a merry go round," Todd continued. "And a few houses and an aquarium and a tunnel and a haunted house and a missile launcher…"

"A missile launcher?" Lance looked up. "Why do I have this feeling of doom?"

"Relax Lance I've got the safety on," Pietro waved as he controlled the train. 

"What do you mean by that?" Todd said. "It ain't a real missile! Right? Pietro? Pietro…"

"I just made a few improvements," Pietro said. 

"I really don't feel comfortable with him in control of the button," Todd went pale. "Can't I drive now?"

"No!" Pietro guarded the controls. "I'm the head conductor! Mine!" 

"Come on man let us have a turn!" Fred grumbled. 

"When I'm finished," Pietro told him. 

"Blow the whistle! Blow the whistle!" Todd bopped up and down in his seat. Pietro obliged him. "Whoo! Whoo!" 

"Hey look!" Lance held up a figure in red. "I'm Scott Summers: Lord of the Dorks! I think I'll take a walk outside. Dum, de dum de dum…" He moved the miniature figure around. "Oh look, train tracks! I think I'll take a walk on them. Uh oh, I'm stuck! Agggh!" 

"Don't worry Scott I, Princess Perfect will save you!" Fred said in a falsetto voice moving around a female figure that happened to have red hair. "Oh no I'm stuck on the train too!" 

"Just then a herd of cows ran over them!" Todd picked up a few cows and simulated a stampede over the two figures. "Mooo! Mooo!" 

"Ow Ow Ow!" Lance and Fred yelped. 

"I'm okay," Lance spoke in a funny voice.

"My hair is ruined!" Fred did his Jean imitation. 

"Here comes the train!" Pietro shouted as the train made contact with the plastic figures. "Yeah! Got 'em!" 

"They're not dead yet!" Lance told him. "Run over them backwards!" Which Pietro did. "There. That got 'em!" 

"But that was not the end of the nightmare of the terrible Train of Pain!" Todd picked up a blue figure. "A little blue fuzzball went to investigate," He placed the figure on the tracks. "And then…" The train came and knocked the figure off the tracks, right next to the aquarium. Todd blinked, then placed the figure inside the aquarium. "Oh no! Shark! Shark! Agggh! Glub! Glub! Glub!" 

"And then Daniels comes skating by," Pietro grabbed another figure. "Little did he know that the missiles…"

"NO MISSILES!" The others all screamed. 

"Fine," Pietro huffed. "I'll just have to settle for him getting run over!" And did so. He grabbed another figure. "Then Kitty came along…"

"Okay leave Kitty out of this!" Lance tried to yank the controls from Pietro. 

"Give it back Lance!" Pietro held on. 

"Hey you've had it long enough!" Todd grabbed on. "Give me a chance yo!" 

"I wanna turn!" Fred grabbed at it as well. 

"MINE!" Pietro shouted.

"Let go!" Todd shouted yanking as hard as he could.

"You let go!" Lance snapped.

"I WANNA TURN!" Fred turned red and tightened his grip on the controls, which then crumbled underneath his fingers.

"Oops," Fred gulped.

"I knew this was coming," Lance gulped as they saw the missile launcher start to smoke. "Run!" 

Pietro ran out of the room fast enough to avoid the missiles. Unfortunately the others weren't as lucky. "Yeow!" Fred yelped as one missile exploded on his behind. "I hate it when my butt gets set on fire!" He ran outside and sat in the snow. 

Todd and Lance ran back and forth, trying to get out of the way of the remaining two missiles, but ended up colliding with each other. "Oh no…" Todd whimpered as he and Lance held onto each other for dear life. 

BOOOOOOM!

Fred came back upstairs just in time to see Lance and Todd, a bit burnt wobble out of the room. "Due to technical difficulties," Todd said in a funny voice. "The Brotherhood Express has been shut down for the day." He fell flat on his face.

"Well that was fun," Pietro giggled. 

"Pietro you maniac!" Lance snarled.

"Hey I got an idea," Todd murmured. "Why don't we tie Pietro to the tracks and see if the train will run over him!" 

"Sounds like a plan to me," Fred punched his fist in his open palm and glared at Pietro.

"Let's get him!" Lance snarled.

"Uh oh," Pietro said. "Time to go!" He ran away laughing with the Brotherhood chasing after him.

"COME BACK HERE YOU HYPERACTIVE MANIAC AND DIE LIKE A MAN!" Lance screamed. 


End file.
